polyhorde: (Default)
For those who care to know such things:

My photos, including all those of the 2008 - 3 Baron's Faire can be found at JJPervier.SmugMug.com

It only took me a year, jeezy-creezy!

I'd like to think that I've learned quite a bit about photography (and my own style) in the past year, we'll just have to see what comes from this summer. Ren Faire is two weeks away, be still my soon-to-be-aching-knees.

PS If, after seeing my stuff (however my best portraiture work is in a private gallery), you feel like getting a few photos taken please contact me. I need the practice, plus its fun playing dress-up while I haul friends anywhere from Hatchers Pass to Seward.

PPS I'm also posting the photos from ATY's Merry Wives and UAA's Fallen should you care to view them.

Run Away!

Feb. 19th, 2009 04:18 pm
polyhorde: (Default)
Well, we've just eclipsed the year mark for crisavec and I living together, depending on if you mark it as the night I moved in suddenly and didn't leave or the day we bought our bed. I expected us to fall apart rather quickly, what with my annoyingly quirky behavior and Dave's introverted ways, but amazingly its been like breathing. I feel like I've been with him for years, in the good way, and I can no longer imagine not having him in my life. On Valentine's he asked me what I thought would come of it that first weekend when we met and flirted shamelessly - he didn't expect anything, he just thought I looked interesting and in want of company - in all honesty, and I told him as much, I was hoping for six months of fun conversations and a relatively clean break-up. I never expected when that cheerful, techno-dude came waddling over to me at the bar that I'd some day make a Prefinanced Panda out of him, or that I'd become his Prefinanced Pookie. We're a few months shy of two years and I'm still twitterpatted. Weird isn't it?

Overall life is going well, I still haven't grown up as much as I'd like. Being as close to my parents as I have been since high school I'm still accustomed to the lifestyle I was raised in, a lifestyle neither Dave nor I can possibly afford, even if we were to both work full time. I need to make that adjustment from being able to go-out whenever I feel like it, to having to pack a lunch every morning or else not have lunch that day. We want kids, and unless I suddenly get discovered and go platinum we'll have to make sacrifices and start saving NOW.

I am questioning getting married, not because I have any doubts that he's the Panda I want to be with for the rest of my life, but more so because I wonder if I'm doing him a disservice. I've never had to nickel and dime it, never had to save up for much of anything - I either got what I wanted or else I didn't want it that badly. Is someone whose financial philosophy is "you can't take it with you" or "what's the point of money if not to spend it" really ready to having a joint bank account, are they really prepared to be responsible for another person's financial well being? I'm just worried I still have a child's mentality and that I'm going to let him down someday because of that naivete.

On the plus side Dave came to photograph a rehearsal for the play I'm stage managing and is certain in his belief that I'll make a good mother. Like herding kittens, I swear. My director is driving me nuts - I think all of my SMing experience is just racking up names of people I will not be working with in the future. It's an . . . uh, interesting play, very artistic and I do like that it was a collaborative script, but its so blatantly biased it makes my brain die a little every time the curtain goes down. I'm ecstatic about my next project, auditions are Monday, it's the women of the Old Testament and their stories as told through acrobatics and ariel silk - imagine Cirque du Soeil: Genisus but on a much smaller budget.

Hello, my name is angie_di and I'm an obsessive personality - we're over a year away, and that's if we can afford it that soon, and I'm already looking at Nevada law, photographers, public land alcohol policies, making guests lists, looking at dress designs, thinking about fabrics and favors and all kinds of meaningless things. I'm at the point where I'm driving myself nuts let alone poor crisavec. It sucks that what makes me so good at my job, giving undivided attention to all of the details about one single event, should be keeping me up at night wondering what sort of deals I could make with the photographer and how to get power for lights and sound out to Eklutna.
I just felt like sharing a tidbit of the hell I'm putting crisavec through, feel free to give him your sympathies. And the instant he actually proposes I'll let you know in sickening detail (no I'm not getting ahead of myself, yes he is going to ask, the bastard has it planned but other than he's going to do it sometime this summer the twerp won't tell me a damn thing).

Much love - J

Fat Pig

Jul. 17th, 2008 02:43 pm
polyhorde: (Default)
For those who are not aware I have been cast as Helen in TTR's production of "FAT PIG" by Neil LaBute. Helen is an over-weight/obese woman who falls in love with an attractive but shallow man. Of the four characters she's the most genuine, the most playful, the most comfortable and the one with the highest self-esteem (at the beginning of the play).
Tom and his co-workers Carter (self-proclaimed asshole) and Jeanie (bitter ex) are all overly preoccupied with image, both their own and that of those around them. When prejudice, body image, and love collide Tom is left with a choice: to be spurned by his friends and remain with the woman he can't help but love, or to reject her for the societal approval he can't help but need.

This play worries me. Not the subject matter but rather issues I fear it will dredge up.
I am obese. I've been over-weight my whole life, I've gone through the rigmarole of being insulted, of hating myself, and have finally - after 20 years of effort - reached the other side. I'm fine with who I am, hell, I even like me most of the time. I have a loving family that looks after each other. I'm in a supportive, wonderful relationship with a man who finds me attractive even when I wake up with gorgon hair and wander around the house all day in my pjs. I'm honest, helpful, reliable, caring, somewhat talented, and have an above-average IQ. I have a lot going for me in life, enough that my appearance has taken a back burner.
Helen has gone through the same and come to the same conclusion. But I still worry, because slowly she looses that acceptance and puts all of her self worth into Tom's opinion of her.
I know it's a play, and I should be able to keep the script from effecting me personally - but even just reading it I still wish to strangle Jeanie and Carter. It hurts, just a little when people call you a disgusting sow who could eat for five, even if it isn't for real.
And I'm not certain whether I should be touched at my father's protectiveness or disappointed that he is choosing to miss this one. He's worried that he'll take the insults thrown at Helen personally "I mean, I know it's a play but they're still insulting my baby girl."
I hate it when guilt and righteous anger blend. I get pissed because they're insulting me, but at the same time I cry because a part of me still agrees with them.

ADDENDUM: This was bugging me, so I spoke with Dad asking for a clarification as to why he wouldn't come to the play. He said he wasn't partially to people being openly thrashed on stage in general but most especially when they were relatives. So that makes me feel better (or maybe it's Octopus's Garden cheerily playing in the background). I have this odd thing of not being bothered by theatre until some asks "Oh my god, I can't believe how well you're taking it, I would be so insulted" and then I kinda feel hurt . . . because they think its a personal insult to me, so I take it as a personal insult -- Yeah, that doesn't make any sense to me either.
polyhorde: (Default)
1) Tonight's cabaret went extremely well, we sold out and 95% of the singers were just lovely.
2) Finals are over and here's hoping I didn't fail anything.
3) I got cast in my first major role. I'm playing Helen in "Fat Pig", a play being produced by Theatre on the Rocks and opening the last weekend of August. I'm looking forward to it but I'm nervous as hell, the character is so similar to me it's genuinely creepy. And I'm not sure yet how comfy I'll be eating sushi (which usually makes me gag) and making out on stage with someone who is currently an acquaintance. Rehearsals don't start until mid-July so I'll stress about it then.

Totaled

Feb. 19th, 2007 09:23 am
polyhorde: (Default)
I'll keep it short since I have to run off to class.
The show ended well, I got the hang of running lights and sound and everything went off without a hitch. It was lovely getting to know them and getting my foot in the door, as far as working in this town. Sunday night I had a second, and different show to tech for and I'd only had one dress rehearsal the day before. It went very well, we were officially sold out even though we still had a handful of empty seats at curtain.
Other news - I'm over my insanity of the past week and a half (thank god, it turns out my brain settled as soon as my cycle was through).
I got my hair cut, it's the shortest its been since I was 9 and got a hair cut that made me loook like a boy.
I was stupid, and looked up just in time to run a red light, thankfully I swerved fast enough that instead of T-Boning them the big-ass SUV hit me. I now have 4 points on my license, a $200 ticket and a bumper shaped indent that takes up most of my passenger side. But no one was hurt (thank you, thank you!) in either car, and I made the cops laugh. As soon as they got out of their car- "Ok, so what happened here?" "It was absolutely, 100%, my fault." "Ok, just hold your horses ma'am, I'll get to you in just a second." (he said it smiling - apparently you're supposed to neither confirm nor deny fault, I did not know this, and even if I did I'd still have told the truth. If I ever get in trouble with the law my lawyer is going to hate me "Yes, I did it, but I'm so sorry!")
I've gotta run, Love you, J

Frustrated

Jan. 31st, 2007 06:27 pm
polyhorde: (Default)
It's been a long time, and plenty has happened - but mainly the past 5 months of my life can be summed up in: Class. Rehearsal. More Class. Movie. Concert. Rehearsal. Show. Rehearsal. Class.

Dear Director,
I realize that you feel you are doing the best you possibly can, I get it. I even understand that you are 40+ years older than me and have directed, written, and performed in more plays than I have ever read. But please, I beg of you, do Not piss me off. I haven't been in a screaming match in SIX Lo-ng years and to be frank I desperately miss it. I have been the epitome of polite, I have never raised my voice, I have never uttered an unpleasant word to anyone - so why is it that you keep cutting my pale impression of authority off at the knees? You really needn't, telling me I was wrong in private would have done the job just as well as doing so in front of the cast (who are, also, decades older than me and who I am finding it quite hard to control). I did two things: 1) I told them that they couldn't call line anymore , to which you stopped me mid-sentence and told that that wasn't what you wanted and 2) I asked (not ordered) them if they would be willing to help the techs finish the set - primarily because we have been cleaning up at 11pm most nights because there are two guys hanging lights and then me and/or the set designer painting. I didn't order them to help, I didn't even guilt trip them into doing so, I asked. And you said that the actors were the first priority that I shouldn't ask them for their help because they had to be up in the morning (apparently unlike me) and that they need to be well rested for the rehearsal the next night (I guess if I can manage to run the lights and sound board while sleeping that'll be just fine). You aren't only upsetting me, you're pissing off the set designer by constantly changing his design and then changing your mind and asking for the first option again. The sound designer whispered to me during notes "Can you kill him for me?". And the lighting designer is having such a crappy few days I don't know what's bothering him.
I can only hope that when we open for the public on Friday night that you will relinquish your role as almighty god-wannabe and sit down and shut up like the rest of the actors. I will not be angry, I will not - I will find solace in flirting with the techs/cast and ignore you as much as possible.
Sincerely, Your Less Than Peachy-Keen SM

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Jess

August 2010

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